The Case of the Rapidly Growing Guest List

When I first started planning our wedding, I imagined a small, intimate wedding with about 100 guests. I sometimes see weddings on TV that have 400 guests, and think “That’s ridiculous! Do I even know 200 people who would I invite to my wedding?”

Well, apparently, we do. That 100 grew very quickly into 110. My mom shrugged. Then it grew to 120. She giggled nervously. The next update was 130. Beads of sweat started to trickle down her forehead. 140. Panic is all over her face. At 165, I just begin to lie and tell her the expected number of guests.

Our reception hall holds 250, so it’s not a matter of room. It’s more of a budget issue. My parents have given us a very generous sum that we can have a beautiful wedding with, and I want to respect that. However, there are just people who someone important (MIL, DH, FMIL, me, etc) wants to be there. And those people have significant others. And children, lots of children.

So, what’s a girl to do? The first thing I did was eliminate any “and guests” from everybody but the bridal party. Sorry, but if you are not seriously dating somebody I am not going to pay for you to bring someone you probably won’t be talking to by the time we celebrate our one-month anniversary. Seven gone. (Wedding party is a different story—allowing them to bring any guest they want is my way of assuaging my own guilt of them spending money to be in the wedding. Love you guys!)

The next thing I did was eliminate anyone we haven’t spoken to in the last three months. We recently moved six hours away, and if that is not a testament to who your true friends are, I don’t know what is. Minus three.

Co-workers were the next pruning group. Everybody who I felt I had to invite “just because” has been slashed. Add another five to the cut pile.

But I am still at 150. And there is still the panicked expression on my mom’s face.

What are your thoughts on the guest list? Who made the cut, who didn’t, and what was your reasoning? I feel guilty cutting kids since they are 1/6 the cost of an adult. Is anyone else amazed by how fast your list grows?